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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27324967">wow jan, how come your bro lets you have TWO boyfriends?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scourgefan12/pseuds/Scourgefan12'>Scourgefan12</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hellsing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Polyamory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 22:21:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,253</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27324967</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scourgefan12/pseuds/Scourgefan12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Doc approaches Jan with a very interesting offer.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Captain Hans Günsche/The Doctor, The Doctor (Hellsing)/Jan Valentine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>wow jan, how come your bro lets you have TWO boyfriends?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Jan found out that Doc was banging the Captain, he was pretty shocked. And really, could you blame him? That was a pretty wacky pair. Like, there were people in Millennium who he thought were fucking, and those two weren't on that list.</p>
<p>The list was pretty simple, actually. On the top was Rip and Zorin. Jan was almost one hundred percent sure Zorin was a huge lesbian, which yeah that was him stereotyping, but whatever. And Rip was the only other chick in the organization, so by process of elimination, if Zorin were fucking anyone it would have to be Rip.</p>
<p>Second on the list was Doc and Major, actually. They seemed pretty close. Buddies who'd survived a war together and teamed up to help orchestrate another, that was like the definition of a power couple. Plus, they'd spent over fifty years together, and as far as Jan was concerned you didn't spend that much time with someone and stay "just bros" like that wasn't a thing that happened.</p>
<p>Third on the list was Luke and Dandy Man. Jan didn't really have a reason for this one admittedly, the two of them just seemed to get along. Maybe this was less him actually believing there was a thing going on and just choosing to think there was so he had something to tease Luke about. But, whatever, on the list it went. Honestly, if he wasn't pretty sure his bro was a flaming homosexual, he'd also add Luke and Rip to the list, they seemed to tolerate each other fairly well.</p>
<p>But, Jan was getting off topic. </p>
<p>Doc and Captain, huh? Weird.</p>
<p>Well, maybe it wasn't <em>that</em> weird. If Jan actually thought it about it, it sort of made sense.</p>
<p>The two of them were together pretty often, being Major's right hand man and bodyguard respectively. Their jobs required them to spend time around each other basically every day.</p>
<p>Well, required Captain to be around Major every day, since Major wasn't a stone cold fucking idiot who wandered around a base full of bloodthirsty vampires without his bodyguard. And since Doc was in charge of a lot of technical stuff regarding the huge ass war they were planning, of course he would be around Major too. They had to communicate about that shit, make sure they were on the same page and that everything was going according to plan.</p>
<p>And this meant, by extension, that Doc and Cap spent time together. So, that probably gave them plenty of time to get to know each other. And, Jan supposed, it wasn't too big a stretch of the imagination to think that this could lead to them growing a little more fond of each other.</p>
<p>So, okay, it wasn't really that strange. Just surprising.</p>
<p>What <em>was</em> strange was how Jan had learned about their relationship.</p>
<p>He'd always expected that if he were to learn about some secret love affair going on between two people, it'd be cause he managed to be all sneaky and get a peek at them going at it, or something like that.</p>
<p>Not that he was a creep who went out of his way to do that sort of thing. He just figured, if people were gonna be stupid enough to leave a way for someone to see them, he couldn't really be blamed for looking, you know?</p>
<p>This isn't how he figured out about Doc and Captain, though. Which was kind of a shame, he really would love to see some hot steamy action with that big bad wolf motherfucker, Doc being involved would just be a bonus.</p>
<p>How he'd actually found out, had been because he was told about it. Doc had sat him down and confessed everything.</p>
<p>Obviously, he'd been confused at first. Why tell him this? Like, why tell anyone in general since it was obvious this was some sorta secret, but why tell Jan specifically? Jan couldn't keep a secret to save his life. In fact, he was already thinking about how Luke would probably get a kick out of this, he <em>had</em> to tell his bro if no one else.</p>
<p>Well, Luke probably wouldn't actually give a shit. The amount of fucks he gave about gossip and who was banging who was precisely zero. Maybe even less than zero, Jan was pretty sure that was possible, negative numbers were a thing that existed, right? Right. But, Jan was gonna blab to him anyway cause... well, why not? He had to spread this juicy shit to somebody.</p>
<p>The reason why they'd chosen to let Jan know about this was real simple. And also completely fucking insane.</p>
<p>Doc informed him that they wanted to get Jan in on what they had going on, like some sorta threesome.</p>
<p>Okay, that was actually a gross oversimplification of the situation.</p>
<p>The fact of the matter was, Doc was interested in Jan. He'd talked it over with the Captain, and they'd agreed that him pursuing something with Jan would be perfectly fine.</p>
<p>Of course, the first words out of Jan's mouth in response were "what the fuck" because honestly, what the fuck? There was a lot to unpack here.</p>
<p>First of all, Doc dating someone else on the side while already being in a relationship. What was up with that? Like, Jan guessed there wasn't anything <em>wrong</em> with it, Doc had talked about it with his boyfriend who was okay with it happening. There was no cheating and nothing going on behind anyone's back. It was just sorta weird. Jan imagined you had to <em>really</em> trust someone to just let them do that shit.</p>
<p>Then there was the crazier part, which was the fact that Doc was interested in him. Like, for real. In a romantic way. I mean sure, they were friends. Sort of, Doc tolerated his presence and outside of his brother that was the closest thing to friendship that he had. But... actually liking him? What the fuck?</p>
<p>If the interest were purely sexual, then Jan would understand. He was a hot piece of ass, couldn't blame anyone for wanting him. </p>
<p>That wasn't the case, though. Like, <em>maybe</em> Doc wanted to fuck him, but more than that he wanted to do stuff like go on dates and kiss and cuddle and... Jesus it was so fucked up.</p>
<p>Not that it was bad, Jan just. Had a hard time understanding. He imagined that he had the romantic appeal of a piece of roadkill stuck to someone's tire, or a disease ridden wild animal, or something along those lines. The thought of anyone liking him like that was so foreign, how was he even supposed to address it?</p>
<p>He wasn't about to say no, obviously. As hard a time he was having wrapping his head around this, he wasn't gonna turn it down. If he did that then he was completely sure he'd die a kissless virgin, cause let's be honest, who else was ever gonna show interest in him?</p>
<p>Not that he was just settling. He'd have to be the dumbest motherfucker on the planet if he thought being with Doc was settling. Doc was a real catch. Hot as fuck, pulling off that slutty mad scientist look insanely well. Which really, was a sort of weird combination of aesthetics, but Doc made it work.</p>
<p>Not that Jan just liked him for his looks, Doc's personality was also pretty awesome. He was smart as fuck for one, like honestly half of what came out of his mouth was absolute nonsense to Jan, just a whole bunch of big words and technical terms he couldn't even begin to understand. </p>
<p>He was also really nice... kind of. He sort of had a temper, but not a real bad one. He was just kinda snappy sometimes, and really, considering the people he was surrounded by, who could blame him? He still tried to be nice and patient and stuff, and that alone said a lot about him. Jan knew for a fact that if he had to deal with half the shit that Doc did, he'd just shoot a bitch.</p>
<p>He was also really focused and determined, if he was absorbed in something then it was hard to break his concentration. On one hand, this was really admirable, and maybe even kind of cute. On the other hand, it was frustrating. Doc was still a human, it couldn't have been healthy to spend hours upon hours of his days working. Like, yeah he was passionate about what he did, but Jesus fucking Christ, would it kill him to just rest once in a while?</p>
<p>So... yeah. Jan liked him. He'd be more than happy to give being in a relationship a shot, if also a bit intimidated. Jan was kind of a drooling idiot, just in general, but especially when it came to romance. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to make someone as amazing as Doc happy.</p>
<p>He said as much. Well, no he didn't, he left the part about being scared out, pretty much just accepting the offer he'd been given.</p>
<p>Doc seemed surprised at this. Good surprised, but still. That was kind of confusing to Jan, had Doc really thought there was a chance of being turned down?</p>
<p>Well, no matter how great you were, if you were proposing something so weird then fear of rejection was probably natural, Jan supposed.</p>
<p>Speaking of which, Jan still had some questions about this whole thing. </p>
<p>Okay, one question actually. That being, how exactly was this gonna work? Him and Doc would just do their own thing, and then when Jan wasn't around Doc would do his usual stuff with the Captain? Would Jan not have a chance at getting involved with Cap at all? Like that was fine if that was the case, but he couldn't deny being a little disappointed. The Captain was fucking <em>hot.</em> Nearly seven feet tall of pure muscle, <em>and</em> he was a whole ass werewolf? Jan really wanted some of that.</p>
<p>Jan, of course, asked this in a way that didn't reveal such blatant lust for Doc's boyfriend. Or, tried at least.</p>
<p>The answer he got was better than he'd been expecting, honestly. Doc let him know that the Captain wasn't overly interested in pursuing a real relationship with Jan, but that was mostly because they didn't even really know each other. He wasn't adverse to getting to know Jan, and would actually be more than happy to try if Jan would be willing.</p>
<p>That was a very fair answer, because really, they didn't know each other. They didn't know jack shit about each other. Hell, Jan hadn't even known Captain's real name til he heard it from Doc's mouth. They'd never spoken to each other before, not even enough to get introductions out of the way. Though to be fair, Jan had ever seen Captain talk to anybody. He had to wonder if the dude even <em>could</em> talk.</p>
<p>After asking, Doc informed Jan the he, in fact, could not. He was completely mute.</p>
<p>That made sense, but also sort of stumped Jan. If Captain couldn't talk, then how were they supposed to get to know each other? How did that motherfucker manage to get close to anybody? Like, was Jan just an idiot? He couldn't really think of any other form of communication aside from talking.</p>
<p>As it turned out, he <em>was</em> an idiot. And also kind of a jackass. But, what else was new?</p>
<p>The Captain communicated mainly through sign language, which... yeah, no shit. Jan really wasn't sure how he managed to forget that a whole fucking language existed. </p>
<p>This presented a bit of a problem, though. Jan didn't know sign language, any variation of it. There were like, different versions for each spoken language, right? Or something like that? Whatever, whether that was true or not didn't change the fact that Jan didn't know it. And he wouldn't be able to make much headway with the whole "getting to know the captain" thing if he couldn't understand anything that was said to him... signed at him, whatever.</p>
<p>Lucky for him, he wasn't completely hopeless. Doc was willing to help, if he was serious about wanting to learn.</p>
<p>Obviously, he wasn't about to just turn an offer like that down. As much as he really wasn't looking forward to showing off how slow and inept he was in the learning department, it wasn't like he had much choice. Not like he'd be able to teach himself.</p>
<p>So, he accepted. They didn't jump into lessons right away, thank god, there was plenty of time for that later. As eager as Jan was to get things started, he wasn't sure if he wanted his first date with his new boyfriend to be a fucking tutoring session.</p>
<p>Thinking this caused an eruption of butterflies in Jan, and he wasn't sure if he found the feeling incredible or repulsive. It's just... Doc really was his boyfriend now, huh? That was an official thing. </p>
<p>Just acknowledging that he was in a relationship shouldn't have flustered him so much, like it really wasn't that big of a deal, but knowing that didn't make the thought any less exhilarating.</p>
<p>He really hoped he was allowed to talk about this with Luke later, like he hoped Doc wouldn't get mad at him for that, because he really wanted to gush about this to someone. He was the luckiest motherfucker in Millennium and he needed someone else to know.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A little while back I was made aware of the concept of DocCap and honestly? I kind of love it, they seem like they'd be cute as hell together. I'm physically incapable of doing anything without inserting Jan into the mix tho, so... now there's this<br/>This was originally supposed to be an excuse to explore Hans' character a little, try and actually write him and stuff, but he doesn't actually show up at all? So whoops. I might end up writing smth else w/ these 3 at some point tho, I really like the potential dynamic (Or, maybe just smth w/ Doc &amp; Hans, who knows)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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